Heartache

Today was probably the hardest day that we have had since we began this journey almost two weeks ago. We were awoken with a phone call this morning from my mother telling us that the nurses said that we needed to get up to the PICU immediately. With a pit in our stomachs, we hurried over to find out that Cora had had a rough night, and that they needed to put her on a more aggresive type of ventilator. Her lungs were collapsed enough that the ventilator that she was on was not getting enough oxygen to her body. As a result her blood oxygen levels had dipped down into the 20's several times over night. For those of you who do not know, (as I did not a few days ago) that is really low. Normally it should be 95-100. Something had to be done to help her, and the doctors felt that this was the first thing that she needed.

However, before they put her on the machine they had to do several other things that were not possible once she was hooked up to it. One of those being an echocardiogram. On the x-ray taken this morning, her heart appeared to be enlarged. So, they decided to make sure that her heart was functioning properly before anything else. It turns out that there was fluid surrounding her heart and thus was giving the impression that it was enlarged. We were so relieved to hear that it was functioning properly though. The doctors also decided to put in an additional line so that they would have more IV access. By the time that all of this was done the doctors felt that Cora had improved enough to not be put on the other ventilator.(PRAISE GOD!!!) She continued to be stable and showed some very small improvements the rest of the day. My sister, who is an ICU nurse, said that it is a miracle that Cora is in the condition that she is tonight. When she arrived this morning she did not hold very high hopes for the day, and was actually very nervous about the whole situation. Tonight we are praising God for bringing Cora this far. We are also praising God for the thousands who prayed for her last night and throughout the day today. We know that God heard our prayers, and that they were answered.

So, where do we stand now? As I mentioned above, Cora has a lot of fluid in the cavity around her heart. Therefore, she is scheduled to have surgery at 8:30 tomorrow morning to drain that cavity, and hopefully bring some relief to her heart and lung functions. It does not seem to be a major deal, but when ever your baby goes off to surgery it makes us as parents quite nervous. If you think of us in the morning please pray.

Days like today are not easy on parents. It was just yesterday morning that the doctors said they were encouraged with Cora's condition. That was quite an upper for both of us. Today, Jess and I felt as though our hearts were being ripped out of our chests each time we turned around. The emotional exhaustion of the day has definately taken its toll on both of us and we are weary. Please pray for rest, and that God would continue to sustain us throughout the coming days.

The scripture that I have written below is kind of long, but it really describes our day quite well. It talks about the many doubts that we were having, and the feeling of abandonment that we experienced. However, if you read on you will find that we serve a god, who is bigger than any of our problems here on earth. Tonight as we go to bed that is the truth that we are holding on to.

Psalm 77

I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me. When I was in distress I sought the Lord; at night I stretched out untiring hands and my soul refused to be comforted. I remembered you O God and I groaned I mused , and my spirit grew faint. You kept my eyes from closing; I was too troubled to speak. I thought about the former days, the years of long ago; I remembered my songs in the night. My heart mused and my spirit inquired; Will the Lord reject forever? Will he never show his favor again? Has his unfailing love vanished forever? Has his promise failed for all time? Has God forgotten to be merciful? Has he in ager withheld his compassion? Then I thought "To this I will appeal: the years of the right hand of the Most High." I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago. I will meditate on all your works and consider all your mighty deed. Your ways, O God are holy. What god is so great as our God? You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples. With your mighty arm you redeemed your people, the descendants of Jacob and Joseph. The waters saw you. O God, the waters saw you and writhed; the very depths were convulsed. The clouds poured down water, the skies resounded with thunder; your arrows flashed back and forth. Your thunder was heard in the whirlwind. your lightning lit up the world; the earth trembled and quaked. Your path led through the sea, your way through the mighty waters, though your footprints were not seen. You led your people like a flock by the hand of Moses and Aaron.


Praise
-For the improvement that we saw in Cora today
-For the very skilled team of doctors and nurses that are caring for her
-That today is over

Prayer
-For Cora's surgery in the morning.
-For strength in the next few days
-For wisdom for the doctors as they treat Cora
-For continued healing for Cora
-For a better day tomorrow